4 Tips to help when you been ghosted

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How Should You Behave When You’ve Been Ghosted? A Healing Guide to Rising with Dignity

Ghosting — when someone you were connecting with suddenly disappears without warning, explanation, or closure — is one of the most painful modern relationship experiences. One moment you’re texting, calling, maybe even planning your next meetup… and then — silence. No reply. No goodbye. Just absence.

You’re left questioning everything:


“Did I do something wrong?”
“Were they ever genuine?”
“Should I reach out again?”

But here’s the truth: ghosting says more about them than it does about you.

Let’s break down what ghosting really means, how to respond with strength, and how to protect your emotional well-being moving forward.


Why Do People Ghost?

Psychologists suggest several reasons why people ghost:

  • Emotional immaturity – They lack the tools to have difficult conversations.

  • Avoidant attachment style – Discomfort with closeness or conflict makes them disappear rather than explain.

  • Disinterest – They lost interest but didn’t want to deal with the discomfort of rejecting you.

  • Fear of confrontation – They assumed fading away would hurt you less (ironically, it usually hurts more).

A 2018 study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that people who ghost often do so to avoid the awkwardness or emotional labor of ending things properly — especially if the connection wasn’t deeply established.

But ghosting is not a reflection of your worth — it’s a reflection of their communication style, maturity, and emotional limitations.


So, How Should You Behave When You’ve Been Ghosted?
1. Do Not Chase

Resist the urge to send multiple follow-up texts like:

  • “Are you okay?”

  • “Did I say something wrong?”

  • “Why are you ignoring me?”

As painful as it feels, chasing someone who has gone silent gives away your power. If someone chooses to disappear, let their silence speak. Your response should be your absence too, not your desperation.


2. Pause Before Personalizing It

It’s easy to spiral into self-blame — especially if ghosting triggers past rejection wounds. But don’t assume you were “too much,” “not enough,” or “unworthy.” Ghosting is rarely about you — it’s about them avoiding discomfort.

Instead, remind yourself:

“Healthy people don’t vanish. I deserve someone who communicates with honesty and respect.”


3. Grieve the Loss Without Romanticizing It

Ghosting creates ambiguous loss — it’s painful because there’s no real closure. Give yourself permission to grieve, cry, and feel disappointed. But avoid romanticizing the connection. If they were truly the right person, they wouldn’t have ghosted.

Journal prompts that help:
  • What did I like about them — and what did I ignore?

  • How did they make me feel — and how do I want to feel in future relationships?


4. Reflect, But Don’t Ruminate

Ask yourself:

  • Did I miss any early red flags?

  • Was I ignoring my intuition?

Use the experience as a mirror — not a hammer. Reflect, learn, but don’t use it to beat yourself up.


5. Move Forward With Boundaries and Grace

When you’ve been ghosted, the best revenge is your dignity and your healing. Block or mute if needed — not out of spite, but for your peace. Focus on rebuilding your confidence, reconnecting with your support system, and calling your energy back.

Reaffirm:

“I don’t chase, I attract. What’s meant for me will communicate clearly.”


Conclusion

Being ghosted hurts — it’s a silent rejection that often leaves more questions than answers. But how you respond is where your power lies. Don’t chase closure from someone who chose cowardice over clarity.

Let their silence confirm what your heart may have ignored: you deserve someone who shows up — not someone you have to search for.


Struggling to let go after being ghosted?
Visit MyOnlineRelationshipTherapy.com for healing tools, personalized coaching, and emotional clarity sessions to help you move forward with strength, wisdom, and self-love.

A confused man indoors looks up while holding a smartphone and credit card, concerned about a financial issue.

You met this amazing guy, you were just getting to know each other. Had gone for a couple of dates, you talk over the phone and text each other every minute, you like him!. Then just when you were starting to warm up to him, he pulls a Houdini act. You contact him, call, text no response you get worried, is he okay?, you get anxious. Days, weeks later, it essentially dawns on you that he has disappeared off the face of “earth”.

Finally, it emerges that he doesn’t have the backbone to break up with you. The person you once thought worshiped the ground you walked on just ghosted you, 4 tips to help you when you have been ghosted.

Ghosted! Do you want your ex back

If you want someone to come back, the most important thing is self love. Additionally, you can’t have neediness, longing, desperation, grovel, think “I will be better if I have them back”. Self-love is your job, do daily meditations, how do you talk to yourself?. No more “character defects”, critical thoughts for instance telling yourself you are not good in doing certain things. 

Equally important don’t engage in this mind dialogue “that you cannot or will never get this”. Eliminate negative talk towards yourself. On the other hand, practice self-affirmations that support what you want.

Why you have been ghosted!
1. Demanding

Complained and nagged about what they didn’t do, similarly, telling them things like “you said you were going to call, you didn’t”

2. Control

Wanting to know where your specific person is all the time, wanting to know if they are seeing other people yet you had not agreed to be exclusive

3. Blaming them for how you feel

Ask yourself if they did that how did you feel, hence be in charge of your emotions and reactions

4. Not having your own life

No hobbies, no interests, always waiting around for them, always wanting to talk with them and for them to make their plans and include you.

What can you do? 4 Tips to help when you been ghosted
Create your own fulfilling life

Work on your life and do things that make you feel satisfied and happy. Consider exploring your interests for instance listen to music, go dancing, finish reading that book, watch a move, enjoy doing things that make you feel good.

Look into your childhood, find new things that used to excite you, that exercise training you have been postponing. Have you been ever interested in traveling. Don’t cancel meeting with your friends to be with your specific person. Be fulfilling in our own self.

Enjoy time alone

Be happy to be you. People come back when you are in a happy place. When you are not disgruntled when you are not blaming them, controlling them, needing them.

Let all that go, recollect and live your life. Spend time alone, get in contact with nature, visit a beautiful garden, do stuff just for you because it’s fun. When you lose track of time that’s when people come back.

Self love meditations and affirmations

Do a vision board of living in the end. Your imagination has to be creative, in fact think of the things you want to happen. Living in the end of what you want. You want love, connection, fun, feeling secure, feeling loved, feeling wanted, having a wonderful peaceful and calm relationship. Put pictures of the end result that you want and desire, cut words, google images, pictures of places you to want to get married and visit.

Some self-love affirmations you can say and script include I am loved, I am wanted, I am a priority, I am important, I matter, I am secure, I am worthy and I am deserving.

Focus on what you have

Find twenty things you are grateful for even while in shower. The more you are in the vibe the more you attract more of what you want in your life including your now ex.

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